Tomorrow: first day of curriculum planning. First day of stepping into Pablo Neruda as a teacher.


I'm nervous.

from architect to architect

Steve: donde trabajas?

10:17 PM me: yeah, i need to take spanish lessons...

10:18 PM Steve: oh.

ou est le travail?

me: je ne parle pas l'espagnol

oh

in the bronx

teaching

architecture

to 10th graders

Steve: eh?

not math?

10:19 PM me: well

it is allegedly

an integration of both

but not really

Steve: umm

10:20 PM don't you know that the gospel teaches us that there are we are to redeem the world and produce fruit through our work?

i think there are some ethical boundaries... teaching architecture? if i had that job i would make sure every kid was convinced not to get into it

me: hahahah

STEVE!

we love the jersey shore

I brought Amy Hsieh home again because both she and Priscilla Lee wanted to go to the beach. I think one of the best things about having my roommate over is that I get to show both her and my home friends off to one another - in a way, it's a merging of the two worlds. I love watching the interactions and the familiarity develop.

:)

Back to Brooklyn in the morning!

shortcomings

Some have asked how the job fair went this past Tuesday. I've told them about my first encounter was with Principal Alcoff, how he told me directly that he was not interested in hiring fellows because out of the nine that he has hired, only two of them have stuck with him past three years.

The other fellows and I weren't sure if it was because there was something wrong with those fellows or if there was something fundamentally wrong with the school. But from what I've read and researched, it seems that Teachers Preparatory School is an establishment that does seek its best for its students. It's located in an impoverished area, but still it struggles to be a haven - and an honorable one at that - for those in the neighborhood. They're serious about what they do, and Principal Alcoff showed that.

One of the things I struggle with is commitment. There's a lot of praise for programs such as TFA and NYCTF, for how we're raising the bar for urban kids and providing for the shortage of teachers [though at the moment, it seems like there are a shortage of vacant positions..], but there's also a lot of criticism - particularly for the high turnover rates. Let's be honest - a lot of us view these programs as a transitional stage, a stepping stone to greater, higher things. Some of us are here to "serve our time" and do our own temporary peacecorps without the commitment [though arguably, NYCTF is comprised of many career-changers who had grown wary of their cubicles in the corporate world and decided they finally "wanted to do something with their lives"]. Some of us aren't even here because we want to "help people" and raise the achievement rates, but because all other things fell through.. and so they'll stick around until the next best thing comes around.

Principal Alcoff told me that the fellows who had been at his school were great teachers - but that didn't matter because they left so quickly.

Sigh.

I do wonder if we have the best interests of these students in mind. I wonder if I could in good conscience apply to this school, not knowing whether or not I consider this to be a long term engagement, or a mere 2-3 year stint.

Anyway, back to those thank you notes.

sharing the world

Dorothy: How do you share the world?

Joyce: By loving one another.

Dorothy: That's so hard!

Joyce: :)

It is.

Dorothy: How do you love people when they're not loveable?

Joyce: You pretend to first.

And then eventually, it becomes easier.

And you pray!

And remember that God loves them.

Dorothy: Hm...

Do you think we could do without the initial pretending?

Or is it a necessary first step

Joyce: Hm.

Perhaps pretend is a bad word..

Mm, I think it's necessary. Because if you don't, you won't take any initiative towards. I guess when I say pretend, I mean that you act as though you love them, even though it's really difficult.

When I was in highschool, Dennis told me to be friends with Priscilla Lee, even though I wasn't really drawn to her.

But I tried to reach out to her anyway, even though I probably wouldn't have done it on my own volition.

And now, I adore her.

I guess that's a dumbed down example. :)

Dorothy: It's a good one

You're living proof that it works

We can't be friends with everyone, right? How do we go about choosing

Or do we need to in the first place

Maybe they'll fall into our arms

Joyce: That is a difficult one..

I guess the copout answer would be whoever God puts a burden in your heart for

But then there are those that you won't have a burden at all for! And yet He calls us to.

HMMM.

But sometimes, they really do just fall into our arms..

Dorothy: Like Priscilla!

Kinda

Joyce: Hahah.

Yes. :)

Kind of.

She is definitely my responsibility.

Dorothy: She fell because Dennis pushed her, or you

Or both

Joyce: Me towards her.

She's an innocent bystander haha.

Dorothy: Oh, so you fell into her arms!

Haha

Joyce: Hahah.

Something like that. =p

I'm thankful for it.

Dennis says that friendships are a way of sharing the world, and it's true.

I'm glad that my friendship with him pushed me towards Priscilla.

That's the way all of our friendships should be.

--

I really like reciting the Apostle's Creed. There's something about confessing your faith that empowers you to really believe it.



I think it should be a rule for all Christians to recite it every Sunday morning.

We're all searching for something to complete us.


Dear Jesus, please make us whole again.

--

Jennifer's father asked us tonight what Christianity is. Dennis replied that it is about Christ. Rightly so.. Christianity distinguishes itself from any other form of morality and religion because its entire belief system is founded upon the promise of salvation as provided by Jesus.



It's always about going back to the cross.

dealing with density?

• Homo affection actually makes me appreciate hetero PDA.. until they keep at it the whole ride to Union Square.
• NYC is like a huge sauna. It's a wonder how not everyone here is skinny.
• If some people were just a little slimmer, we would be able to fit more people in a car. It's true. This makes me look forward to winter time, when everyone is all bundled up.. not.
• There are way too many people in Times Square. It's unlivable.
• I hate trailing smokers.. but it seems to happen all too often.
• Starbucks is my bathroom stop.. because there's one on every other corner. Unless you're in the shopping district on the Upper East Side.
  

• If you're in a car in Soho during rush hour and you really need to pee and you're not the driver, you do have time to get out and use the bathroom of the gourmet grocery store at the corner, and the car will still not have moved by the time you've done your thing and returned.
• Express trains are also handy when you have to pee. Subway restrooms are not. It's for those moments you should always carry toilet paper and hand sanitizer around at all times. [Though Purell should really inject some moisturizer into their formula.]
  
• Never go to Trader Joe's during rush hour. Unless you want to be examining chicken breasts next to customers standing on the "12 items or less" line.. which wraps around to the front of the store. [But do go to TJ's in the mornings. And do buy the 99cent "I used to be a plastic bottle" tote bag - you also get entered into the $25 raffle every time you use it!]
• Unless you plan on purchasing bootleg merchandise, walk on the south side of Canal Street.
  
• Bring a book with you wherever you go. One good thing about public transportation is that you can travel and educate yourself simultaneously.. or just educate yourself when the E train gets stalled for 50 minutes due to falling debris. Yes, books are key. Plus, if you have the right one, it can be a useful conversation starter [ie: Savage Inequalities by Jonathan Kozol]. Oh, but carry them in ziplock bags to avoid wear and tear - thanks to ktachong for that piece of advice! Those books will go through a lot in this city.
  

• Still too many churches here to choose from for my liking.. :(
  

truth

Yesterday, today, forever,
Jesus is the same.
All may change, but Jesus never
Glory to His name!

Glory to His name,
glory to His name.
All may change, but Jesus never -
Glory to His name!