I don't remember the last time I laughed so hard my back hurt. I miss that.

During nearly every communion for the past year, I've asked God for one thing - faith. I thank Him that despite my faithlessness and my unfaithfulness, that He loves me regardless and that His body and blood covers me. Every Sunday, I repent for not acknowledging Him more during the week, and I pray with hope that the new week would bring something better because I've abided in Him. And then I ask for faith - faith to believe, faith to trust that He's even there. I ask for faith because I know that my own is so little. I pray for stronger conviction that He lives and that my life is lived for Him. Every week, I'm hanging on by a strand trying to find that faith again.

What I need is for Him to find me. Dear God, please - make me yours again.